I woke up this morning and realized I don't want to be the same person people think or thought I am. I am not a shy, quiet little mouse! Yes, I am quiet but I am not shy, I just have nothing to say most of the time. I am not the sweet well mannered good girl. Don't get me wrong, I don't qualify for the bad girl title either. It's just that many people don't know who I am or what I am all about. People just assume by my looks and that I am quiet. For years I just let everyone believe what they wanted because they were at least nice to me. However, I think I missed out on a lot of life because of it. I realize that if people can not accept me for who I am then they are not really worth my time. I spent many years trying to "fit in" ; to be accepted. I don't believe I do fit in but I am now accepted.

Saturday I went to a trashy bar to see my favorite band, "Knee Deep in Grass". Everyone there was either drunk, high or both. I don't do drugs and I rarely drink yet I didn't feel out of place. No one there cared if I smoke up or not. They were the so called "social outcasts". I don't "fit in" to their crowd either yet they all accept me for who I am and appeciate that I accept them. They never treat me like I am different or that I don't belong. Instead they seem pleased that I am there.

I am going to try not to worry about other peoples opinions and think only about what I think. I hope that one day I will come to a point that I feel I belong in all aspects of my life. But I will let this subject drop for a while because Knee Deep is playing again tonight so I should get going.