Sick of being Sick
2006-03-22, 8:52 a.m.
I haven't written in a while. I have lots to say yet have nothing to say.
I have has sort of a transitual month (or two) in the sence that I have been thinking alot about how my life has to change. And it does I can not fuction like this for much longer.
Since my shift at work change (from 5-10 to 12:30-5:30) I have been sick. It's been one thing after another and well I don't like being in an unhealthy state.
I am not happy in this job but I feel trapped in it. I like the paycheck and we are trying to pay off our debt so we don't have to worry when we have a baby. (I want to be a stay at home mom) If we are mostly debt free then we will have no problem living on one income. (if we keep budgeting like we are now then we should be debt free not counting car and house by June)If I do quit it will take weeks before they can find someone else to take my place so there is no point looking for a new job until I'm replaced. The other job also gets in the way cause I do that job 9-12. I don't really want to work evenings again cause 1. I will never see my husband 2. I will have to put off my schooling again. 3. I want to put my dog in obediance classes and they are only in the evenings
I am also sorta resentful of the job cause I had a early misscarrage. It was very early so it was ok and the dr. said it was a good thing. cause the painkillers i was on for my wrist would have caused birth defects. So the combanation of me being sick and the painkillers caused it. (even though I was off the painkillers when i got pregnant) He said the meds would have stayed in my system for a few weeks after. So ya...I've been sorta in limbo just doing what I need to be doing but I want more in my life. I want more meaning.
I went to the FASD conference in Calgary this past weekend. I didn't learn much in the sence of information on FASD but I did learn about what was out there for people with FASD or the caregivers of people with FASD. I had no idea how much was out there. I'm not sure what I want to do in the field now but I am signing up for school again. I emailed the program coordinator yesterday to find out if its is best to apply now or wait until the fall. I talked to her at the conference and she said it will be no problem to take the program in Whitecourt. (its distance learning so I can start at anytime) I only have 5 courses left in the program to do and then do the practicum.
So I guess since the month is almost over most of my new changes in my life will happen in April.
I have has sort of a transitual month (or two) in the sence that I have been thinking alot about how my life has to change. And it does I can not fuction like this for much longer.
Since my shift at work change (from 5-10 to 12:30-5:30) I have been sick. It's been one thing after another and well I don't like being in an unhealthy state.
I am not happy in this job but I feel trapped in it. I like the paycheck and we are trying to pay off our debt so we don't have to worry when we have a baby. (I want to be a stay at home mom) If we are mostly debt free then we will have no problem living on one income. (if we keep budgeting like we are now then we should be debt free not counting car and house by June)If I do quit it will take weeks before they can find someone else to take my place so there is no point looking for a new job until I'm replaced. The other job also gets in the way cause I do that job 9-12. I don't really want to work evenings again cause 1. I will never see my husband 2. I will have to put off my schooling again. 3. I want to put my dog in obediance classes and they are only in the evenings
I am also sorta resentful of the job cause I had a early misscarrage. It was very early so it was ok and the dr. said it was a good thing. cause the painkillers i was on for my wrist would have caused birth defects. So the combanation of me being sick and the painkillers caused it. (even though I was off the painkillers when i got pregnant) He said the meds would have stayed in my system for a few weeks after. So ya...I've been sorta in limbo just doing what I need to be doing but I want more in my life. I want more meaning.
I went to the FASD conference in Calgary this past weekend. I didn't learn much in the sence of information on FASD but I did learn about what was out there for people with FASD or the caregivers of people with FASD. I had no idea how much was out there. I'm not sure what I want to do in the field now but I am signing up for school again. I emailed the program coordinator yesterday to find out if its is best to apply now or wait until the fall. I talked to her at the conference and she said it will be no problem to take the program in Whitecourt. (its distance learning so I can start at anytime) I only have 5 courses left in the program to do and then do the practicum.
So I guess since the month is almost over most of my new changes in my life will happen in April.